Silent Night

We have a guess writer today! Marriner wrote about our amazing kids, and I want to share what he wrote:

Saturday night was one of those really special experiences as a parent. The branch youth's December activity was to interpret the big choir concert up at the Temple visitor center and invite all of the branch to come. So the songs were divided out among the youth, and then as a little bit of an afterthought, we added Lillian as well.

It was really, really awesome to watch the kids do the interpretations. I had not realized that there were not already existing interpretations on YouTube. So, the kids really had just done everything by themselves. They had come up with the interpretation, they wrote out a gloss [an unofficial written notation of the signs you'll use - ASL has no written language], and they signed the songs! It was really, truly impressive for me to see how good they are getting. You'll have to watch the videos, but a few points of note. Lige did a really good job sort of getting into the music. You can imagine how hard it is to sort of dance with the music to express it. Especially when you're the only one up there doing it. But, Lige managed to do that and have a very nice balance of emoting the song. Ellis did a really good job of signing some pretty advanced songs. I was very impressed by her interpretations and then also her ability to to to think on the fly. There was one point where she and Lige were working together, and someone missed their line, or the choir saying it a little bit differently than the recording, or something happened. And Lige sort of took the line and went ahead and signed that and Ellis just figured it right out and followed up and everything worked together very smoothly. If she had not told me later that that is what happened I never would have noticed anything. It was pretty cool. She will also have to tell you sometime her really truly hilarious idea for how they should have signed the Gloria song. That song is all in Latin anyway and it's mostly just repeating a couple of words. They say Gloria, Gloria, Gloria, over and over and over again. And then they switch, and they say amen, amen, amen, amen,... You get the point. [It wasn't actually quite that bad, but almost. It was John Rutter's Gloria.]

And speaking of languages, Lillian had a funny thing for one of her songs, too. She had learned the song in English. But then, when the choir started, they started in French! well, Lillian did not miss a beat. She just went ahead and signed what she knew went along with the tune at that point, and it turned out beautifully.

(Back to Christine) So, our kids are musical interpreters now. The thing that impresses me the most is how pretty their translations were. They all flowed so artistically and musically. It was better than I would have done myself. And they got up and performed them in front of several hundred people! With smiles!

Here's what I really loved about this activity: one thing we left behind when we joined the branch were some opportunities to develop performing talents. My kids don't really play the piano in church much any more.That was a big part of growing up for me, using the talents I'd developed for service, to help others feel the Holy Ghost in their lives. It's where I started to learn about service. Watching my kids practice and try their best to put their hearts into it, I saw them go through the same process of anxiety and frustration at parents who make you do your VERY BEST (not just "good enough"), then experience the great satisfaction of a job well done, knowing you helped someone else. It gives you so much confidence! It was so neat to see my kids go through that wonderful process!

Of course, what you really want is videos:

Rutter's Gloria (Lige and Ellis)

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas (Lige)

Winter Wonderland (Lige)

Pat-a-pan/He is born (Lillian - the one she took on at the last minute when someone was sick, and they busted out singing in French instead of English...She really rocked it!)

A song I don't know the name of (Ellis)

Angels we have heard on high (Lillian, who got great compliments on her beautiful "Gloria" - she thinks you'd enjoy seeing what came right before: don't curl your papers!)

All the interpreters before the concert started

Lige looking happy. Really :)

Ellis signing "Excelsis"

Lillian signing "Gloria"

In further Christmas music joy, on Sunday, I was playing prelude and came to Silent Night. Jane sits next to me on the bench, and she started singing and signing along. I didn't know she'd been paying attention to the signs! I tried to find some way to discreetly poke Marriner, sitting just 5 feet away, without distracting Jane, but it didn't work, and nobody else got to see it. I even looked to see if by any chance she was on camera ;) But even if she was, she was behind me, so nobody would have seen her anyway. But it was adorable. Later at a baptism, we sang Silent Night again, and some of the other branch members got to see her sign along. But Marriner still missed it. She was sitting on his lap ;) Oh, and a funny story from the Nursery teacher (who is hearing). "[The other girl in Nursery} wanted to sing "Let it Go" in singing time today. And guess what - both she and Jane know ALL the words!" I don't think the Nursery teacher was expecting that song to last very long. Wrong! They really do know all. the. words.

Gratitude

The sermon today was on gratitude. Sister F. told a fabulous story about a man who woke up and found himself wrapped in Christmas wrapping paper - his life was a gift! Next to him was his gift-wrapped wife - he'd been given a wife! In walked his two kids (in wrapping paper, of course), then he saw his gift-wrapped light switch, faucet (clean water!) and oh - a shower! With hot water! And look, he got a briefcase - he had a job! And a car! And even good food! So many wonderful Christmas presents!

This story went really well in ASL, and I have to say, Sister F is a wonderful story teller. We've been encouraging our kids to pay attention in Sacrament meeting, and this one really caught the eyes of at least the older kids. I felt real gratitude for that!

Friday night, Lige's bike was stolen. He'd lost his bike helmet, so he left his bike locked up at the school, and we forgot to go pick it up. When we went the next day, we found the broken lock on the ground. It was so depressing. We've had at least 10 bikes stolen in the 10 years we live here. And this was a nice bike, which was Lige's primary mode of transportation. I was feeling angry and frustrated. And then Marriner said something that just changed my whole perspective. "Well, our son had his bike stolen, but at least our son wasn't out stealing bikes."

I thought of some mom out there whose son was out who-knows-where (well, I know where - at the high school, with a hammer, thinking he was so clever for breaking the lock on that bike) and how all her hopes and dreams for him seem to be going down the drain as he makes worse and worse decisions. I guess having a bike stolen isn't that bad.

And as I thought about it more, I realized that actually, we've had a lot of blessings to help replace all these bikes that have been stolen. We've hardly ever paid for our kids' bikes - most of them are given to us, or Marriner gets a bike someone is throwing out that he can repair. So I can't really complain.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. Praise be to God for his bountiful blessings to all of us.

Noise

A friend in the branch told me about taking her kids to their local hearing ward so they could get to know some of the members that live close to them. "My kids hated it," she said. "There was so much noise and distraction."

Knowing ASL changes the way you deal with noise. I've noticed this in our family Before we knew ASL, if we were in a crowded, noisy room, we would yell to communicate. Now, that just seems like a horrible way to communicate! Why would we want more noise in the room?

I recently went to eat lunch with Lillian at school for her birthday. Since our middle school is so far away, and middle schoolers are usually too cool to eat with their parents, I hadn't been to lunch at that school before. I should have remembered that the noise in the lunchroom spurred my oldest son to do a science fair project investigating the health of noise levels at various school environments. (Answer: the lunchroom wasn't great, but school dances were actually at unhealthy levels after 1 hr. Interestingly, none of the administrators who saw this project suggested changing anything. But I digress...) I was shocked at how loud the room was. For some reason, they think that 180 kids trying to talk in the same room isn't enough, and they play music, too. I 100% don't get it. I literally could not hear the person right next to me. So of course, I'm trying to say hi to Lillian's friends and get to know them. And try as I might, I couldn't bring myself to yell to be heard. All I could do was pull out my hands and try to communicate with them. I'm sure all these girls just think we're the weirdest family ever. But once you know sign language, you lose your taste for shouting.

There's a FB page named #whyIsign that shares people's videos of why they sign. Usually, reasons are something like, "Because I'm deaf" or "I have a deaf cousin" or "I meat a cute girl that was deaf". I think about my reasons why I sign:

• Because I hate too much noise
• Because my kids need to learn another language
• Because I really love being able to talk when my mouth is full

#that'sthetruth #it'snotjustaboutthegoodreasons 

So close...

I had a funny conversation the other night that you might enjoy. We were chatting before a Primary presidency meeting. One mom moaned about her child leaving all his stuff all over the floor when he gets dressed in the morning.

"Sorry to tell you, but even my oldest still leaves his stuff on the floor when he gets dressed. I don't think it's going to get better," I wryly reply.

(Looks of surprise.)

"Lige still wears a pull-up?"

Oh, I'd missed that sign. Yeah, no Lige totally does NOT wear pull-ups any more. Nor does he leave pull-ups on the floor, because he knows that's nasty. And really, he doesn't leave his clothes all over that much, either. Just sometimes. Because, you know, the world might turn upside-down if a teenager was perfect. :)

And to their credit, none of the other ladies in the meeting laughed their heads off at me.

God moves in a mysterious way!

Today, I took Lillian to violin lessons in the morning, then went straight to Sam's school to help with the book fair. I got home about 12:30, and was surprised to be met by Ellis, whom I had presumed to be at school. Unfortunately, she'd missed her bus in the morning and didn't know where I was or how to get a hold of me, so she waited at home until I finally joined her. We were going to jump back in the car and run her down to school when we did some math. We realized that she'd only make it for 1 1/2 classes, and both of those classes were easy to catch up on at the moment. So we went inside and she got out her laptop to do her work, which had been posted online already.

In the hubbub of figuring out what had happened, I asked, "why didn't you call Dad?" Because, you know, even though one parent is sorta busy, he's still a parent. Turns out, the idea hadn't even crossed her mind. "But even if I'd thought of it, I don't know if he could have picked me up. He ran out the door this morning to go visit Ruth (name has been changed). She's in the hospital."

What?!? Ruth is one of Ellis's good friends, and her mom is one of my good friends! So I got on the phone and found out that yes, her friend is very sick and is going to be in the hospital for a while. Marriner suggested that she'd really like a visit, since she's mostly sitting around waiting for test results to come back now. So while we waited for Jane to wake up from her nap, we made some cookies, then we headed up to Children's National with Ellis and all the littles.

We got up there and found out that kids under 14 aren't supposed to be allowed in unless they're siblings. But a nice nurse let Ellis come in and hang out while the rest of us touched bases really quick then went to the waiting room. They had a fabulous waiting room, and my bag was packed well, so we had a good time hanging out. And we went down and got some dinner when we started to get squirrelly. Ellis brought some games and they just played for 2 1/2 hours. The nurse commented to me on what a good friend Ellis was to come and hang out with her.

That was when I realized that actually, this whole thing shouldn't have been possible. Usually Tuesdays are Lillian's orchestra night. The girls get home from school and I take off with Lillian. But orchestra was canceled tonight. Still, Ellis doesn't usually get off the bus until 5:00 or 5:30, which was way too late to drive an hour up to the hospital (it's 14 miles, incidentally...) and get people to bed on time. (Tuesday is also Marriner's church night, so he's not home to help out.) But today, Ellis missed the bus. And I wasn't home to give her a ride.

And we have to ask ourselves...did God actually make Ellis skip school today?

And...can I put that in the note to school explaining her absence? "Dear school, please excuse Ellis's absence due to the hand of God yesterday."

Well, maybe she won't get an excused absence....

Recording the hand of the Lord in our lives

Today, we had a special devotional for our area of the country with two of our Apostles, Elder Christofferson and Elder Ballard. Elder Ballard talked to us about seeing and recording the hand of the Lord in our lives. He said, "Look for the hand of the Lord in your life and in your family. Record and share these stories!...I do not believe you are here by coincidence."

Today was full of the hand of the Lord with my family. So, being a good little girl, here I am to record some of our stories :)

The day started off a little rocky. We spend yesterday at the beach (yes, I know it was freezing cold. It was still wonderful. So there.) so my kids were up a little late. And it turns out I'd forgotten about a meeting before church today. So we had to get ready...quickly. This involved a lot of showering and a lot of cooking. We usually bring muffins for lunch, but today we needed some dinner too. Ellis and Lillian made muffins and I tossed my fastest reliable and easy crock pot meal together. I planned an easy Primary lesson. We packed some toys for the kids to play with while I was in my meeting. We made it work. Off we went to church, with everything except the kitchen sink!

One of the things I noticed first was that Sam had a really good day today. He's struggled a lot lately with things not going the way he wants, or having to make concessions for the good of the whole. But today, he didn't get upset about having to leave early or while Lige and Ellis were babysitting him during the meeting. Which is amazing because he's soooo sleep deprived right now. We've stayed up late a lot this weekend. (And by comparison, he was a lot more grumpy yesterday, when he was a lot less sleep deprived!)

Our church goes from 12-2pm, and the devotional was at 4pm. It was a bit of an awkward time for us, so we decided to just stay at the church, eat some dinner, then watch the fireside. As we talked to people, we kept inviting people to join us. Then Marriner asked if we had enough for the interpreter and her family, who had not been planning to stay because of small children, but she was the only interpreter at church today, so she was willing to help. I said, "of course!" not knowing if that was actually true...but I just thought of the story of the loaves and the fishes, and felt completely comfortable  saying that we'd have plenty. And guess what - we did. That meal which usually feeds my family actually fed 16 people today. Some of them ate really fast right as the devotional was starting, which probably helped them not eat so much :) And the hearing ward in our building had left some food from their potluck earlier, which increased our humble meal. :) So it all worked out.

After we ate, Marriner and I took charge of all the kids, who were not really thrilled at going to more church, so the interpreter and her husband could work/watch the broadcast. We figured we could wrangle kids and listen at the same time, but they couldn't interpret or watch the interpretation with tired kids. We felt really good about it, but as the kids got bored-er and bored-er, I didn't hear so much of the last talk. But at the end, a sister in the hearing ward (Marriner's 2nd cousin!) came up and said she'd figured I wasn't catching much of the broadcast any more and voice recorded the end of it for me, if I wanted her to email it to me. So thanks to her inspired thoughtfulness, we all had access to the message of the gospel today. How cool is that?

A couple of my kids got some neat experiences today. In Primary, we had some hearing visitors, which meant we needed some interpretation. Lillian got to do that. She interpreted into English during opening exercises, then in class, the teacher spoke in English and Lillian signed for the Primary president, who was also in the class. It was her first time signing, and I hear she did a great job. Lige also got to interpret his class, as the oldest youth in the branch in attendance today. And during the devotional, I was sitting out in the hall, playing with magnet tiles (see above paragraph...) when I looked up during the rest hymn and saw Lige interpreting the music. (Have I gushed enough yet about our chapel's wonderful glass back wall?) I don't know how he ended up doing that, but you know, I'm a mom, and you know how your momma heart feels when you see you kid doing something that requires skill and hard work. I admit, I was just proud of him. "Look! My kid's an ASL interpreter!"

Anyway, it was a neat day. I felt guided by the Spirit in a lot of little things, but it's always neat to feel like the Lord can use you. And it was fun to see my kids stretch and grow. Even the little ones, who did things that were hard for them like stay at the church for 8 straight hours :)

Ministering

Sunday, we invited one of the sisters I minister to for lunch. She's a new student at Gallaudet who is married with 3 children (the youngest is 18). She left her family back home to go get her degree. Obviously, it's tough. I enjoyed having someone other than kids to talk to on Sunday afternoon, and she seemed to enjoy getting off campus and talking to adults. Ha. I was a little worried about being hospitable, since it's hard to cook and sign at the same time. But the kids volunteered to make lunch so I could talk. They were having a lot of fun, and decided to do a restaurant. So, our friend got to experience the gourmet food at Tropical Klondikes, which is the name all our pretend restaurants have. It stems from the first time the kids ever did a pretend restaurant for a date night for their parents, maybe 7 years ago, and I have no recollection of how we came up with that name. Maybe we were having stir-fry and ice cream on the menu? (Maybe that was the time we tried Baked Alaska for the first time? It didn't turn out really great...) This time, the restaurant specialized in grilled cheese and tomato soup. We both had the pesto monterrey jack. It was pretty amazing stuff! The first time we went to Tropical Klondikes, I pretty much did all the cooking, and the kids just put the food on plates and brought it out. And that was about as much as they could do handle! This time, the kids did everything except for slice the bread. They made homemade tomato soup, created various grilled cheese sandwiches, made a menu, mixed juice, and everything. They're getting so big and capable! And they did it all in ASL, except when they wanted to ask a question without our visitor overhearing. (Mom, are we allowed to have dessert?)

After we ate lunch (which really became dinner, we didn't eat until almost 5) and Marriner made it home and we sat around and talked some more while Marriner ate, our guest said and old missionary from their deaf branch in CA had just texted that he was in town, and was actually staying at a hotel close to our house, so he came over to visit. He had a close female friend with him, who is hearing and learning ASL (because, you know, she's really likes this guy, as she put it to me later on...) Well, it turns out that SHE served in the Cauayan, Philippines mission. So we had one group signing and another group speaking Tagalog. As we spoke, our hands were naturally filling in words we couldn't remember in Tagalog with the sign. No need to throw in any "kuwan" or conjugate the word for what (mag-ano ka ba?) Both our brains were clearly working through the 3-languages-at-one-time thing in the same way. All-in-all, the evening was a blast, and I was glad to meet some wonderful new friends!

Oh, speaking of brains processing languages - this is from our two-year old, as reported by Marriner. He says that when he helps her pray, when he uses the sign for "now" or "today" -

From www.lifeprint.com

Jane will sign two-day instead:

 

from www.lifeprint.com

What the heck?!? Even my little two-year old is translating in her head.

ILY

Jane is so cute! She just got the fine motor skills down to make the "I love you" sign!

Turns out, this is a tricky little thing to do. Heck, it took her until she was two and a half to be able to hold up two fingers to show how old she is. I'm sure it doesn't help that her fingers are so adorably pudgy :)

So, she usually signs I Love You with her left hand...she's WAY better with her left hand than her right hand...does this mean she's going to be a lefty, like her Mom and kuya??

Probably not. I quizzed her today, and she signed almost everything right-hand dominant. But a few things she did with her left hand. Still, not getting my hopes up...

More of the ASL Bee and General Conference

The ASL Bee is still popular in our family. I don't know that many people study or anything, but Martha, Jane and I do study sometimes during lunch. This, and the fact that Martha pays attention to things, has set up a fierce rivalry in the little kid division.

Martha won the first 3 weeks. Jane is doing a great job, too, never winning, but actually knowing a lot of the words she gets. Sam doesn't like this. So he's actually started trying at something, which is not his usual M.O. :) But last night, he won the coveted ice cream bar! Woohoo!!

Jane and Martha are both very reluctant to express themselves in sign language. They understand what you say to them, as evidenced by their obedience, or the way they whisper back their response. (Gah! Why do my kids think whispering is the right way to communicate when everyone is signing?!? Anyway...) But getting them to sign back is tough. It turns out, they totally know the signs. I asked Martha this week how to sign "idea" and Jane totally knew it. That's not really a 2-yr old word. Except she's so funny - everything you sign with a pinkie, she does with her thumb. Like her name - wave her thumb, then "e". I remember Martha doing this, too, actually, now that I think of it...

Actually, we practiced the manual alphabet the other day. I spelled, Jane told me what the letters were. "A-B-C-D-Jane."

We watched General Conference this weekend in ASL with the sound on. Because we like the English :) Marriner wanted to watch one session with the sound off, so he went upstairs and watched the General Women's Session by himself. It makes us happy that my sister who lives nearby also turns on the ASL. It's good. But it had a funny down-side this year.

President Merrill and Bishop Harris, of the hearing ward, challenged the Seminary kids to General Conference jeopardy. Losers cook breakfast. The kids were determined to beat the bishops, and payed attention like I've never seen teenagers do before. But seriously, Marriner and Bishop Harris are bright guys, and I didn't give the kids much chance of winning. So last night, I was quizzing Marriner about talks to get him ready, and he was sorta struggling to remember who'd said what. Finally he confessed, "I can only picture the interpreter!" Will it make a difference? Will the kids come home with glory and honor? I won't know until Lige gets home from school, because nobody sent me a text after Seminary bragging. :)

A testimony to my son

A very public meltdown during the Sacrament on Sunday revealed to the world that Sam's struggling a little bit right now with a lot of emotions. We've had a couple of rough weeks where Sam has been angry at a lot of things, and we're both feeling pretty exhausted by it. I'm exhausted at trying to be a good mom in the face of great temptation to smack my kid, and Sam's exhausted at always being in trouble, and feeling like he can never succeed. I think everyone else in the family is tired of having to take care of their own problems while Sam and I work on his. So, it's been rough on all of us.

Sam lost his temper again this morning, and after finally calming down, he cried and hugged me and said, "It doesn't matter how hard I try, I can't do things right. I don't have any choice." As I hugged him, I felt all of his despair. We sat in the rocking chair, and I told him a story. "Long, long ago, we lived in heaven with our Heavenly Father. He told us that we needed to go to earth to progress. And someone named Satan said, 'I will make it so everyone has to be good, and they can all come back to heaven.'" Sam didn't like that idea, because of all the people I know, Sam values his freedom to choose the most. "Then someone else named Jesus Christ stood up and said, 'I will pay the punishment for everyone's mistakes so that everyone can choose for themselves.'" Tears came to my eyes as I told Sam that I know life is hard, but Jesus Christ had given him a fabulous gift: the power to overcome ANY problem he had in life. I felt it as strong as anything I've ever felt before - we (every. single. one. of. us, even Sam) CAN overcome ANY problem we have. The moment I said it, I knew it was completely true.

Think of it: we have the power to choose for ourselves. No thing or person can make us be the way we don't want to be, because of our Savior, Jesus Christ. And that's just fabulously amazing to me today. I'm really grateful for that beautiful moment of clarity in the midst of a tough morning.

Choose good, all y'all. Even if it's hard.

More kid funnies

You know, learning a language requires going out on a limb a lot, and that means you make mistakes. And mistakes are sometimes funny. So I don't want my kids to think (when they grow up and found out that I wrote all this stuff about them) that I'm making fun of them. I'm just keeping a sense of humor about our life adventures! And I'll say, especially in praying, it's so easy to get in a rut and just say the same things over and over. So kudos to my kids for trying to say new things!

On Saturday, Sam was anticipating the start of school after the weekend and tried to sign, "Please bless the start of school." But he couldn't quite remember how start goes...so he did the best he remembered, and instead signed, "Please bless school to hurt."

__________

We were on the way home from that only-somewhat-painful first day of school drop-off when Martha saw a dog in a car and thought that was sort of cool. This blew my mind, because Martha has traditionally had about the same opinion of dogs as she does of spinach, bears or martians: they are definitely to be avoided. I asked, "Do you want to have a dog for our car, too?"

"No, we should get a dog for our yard, and then we can take it in the car when we want to. But not a dog, a puppy. Because a puppy is a baby dog. They're small."

(Mom is thinking, yeah right you'd like a puppy. They're really hyper and would scare you to DEATH.")

"Hey, Mom! I know how to sign baby dog! You sign baby, then dog!"

She was very proud of herself :)

----------

I read an alphabet book to Jane today. I said the letter, and signed it, too. She's getting pretty good at her letters, so when we got to "e" I said, "What letter is this?" She looked at my hand and triumphantly declared, "Jane!"

See, when we spell her name, J-A-N-E, she just sees the E at the end. So she thinks E is Jane.

How cool is that, she has a letter of the alphabet named after her!

-----------

So, I did something I know I shouldn't do this week. I was talking to some friends, and they used a sign I didn't know, and I was sorta losing track of the conversation, and I was a little tired...so I just smiled and nodded a bit. Usually the conversation comes back to something I understand, and I can rejoin pretty quickly. But suddenly, one of the ladies turned to me and signed, "Do you like (the word I didn't know.)? Gah, I was caught! I'd been here nodding like I was totally following the conversation, and now I had to confess that I didn't have a clue what they were talking about.

It was sushi.

And, yes I like some sushi, but no, I'm not totally in love with it like some people are. Just in case you're wondering, like my friends probably still are, because it took so long for me to figure out what they were talking about that the conversation sorta broke down. :) But it's ok, we're in Primary together, so they have to talk to me again. Bwahaha :)

Pretend church

Our family has been going through the WORST cold I think we've ever had. Oh, my sweet Ellis, who got sick the day after we got home from our family reunion. Her Grandpa got something that sounded exactly the same. We thought it was strep throat, because her throat was so sore and she had a fever. But she also had a cough like nobody's business. And, the strep test came back negative, so guess it wasn't. But it was as bad as strep, anyway.

Two long weeks of Ellis being sick - a week of fever and headache and cough, then an ear infection! And literally the day she starts to feel better, Lige and Lillian get a sore throat...

Friday, Sam got it.

Yesterday, we discussed who would go to church and who would stay home. Lige volunteered to babysit, since he was still feeling too lousy to go to church, but well enough to take care of everyone else. And we decided to leave Jane home. Because, even if she wasn't sick yet, she was certainly contagious, and shouldn't go to Nursery. So today, I went to church with just Martha and Ellis. It was quite lonely feeling!

It turns out that Martha still doesn't like sitting on the pew, even without anyone else to bug her :) Otherwise, church was awfully relaxing. We got home to everyone watching a church movie, and Jane taking a nap. I went down and said hi, and asked how church had been. Our family has a long-held tradition when people are sick of Pretend Church. This was just the first time they've had Pretend Church without any parents involved :)

Lige got pretty into it. He printed a program. I found it on the ground and slipped it into my pocket to keep forever, because it's adorable :) We always invite someone cool to be the speaker at our pretend church, and Lige went above and beyond this time by inviting someone who...well...is coming all the way from the other side of the veil to speak to our family :) It was awfully nice of President Monson to come visit us!

Something new this time was inviting the entire Tabernacle Choir to church. That was nice of them to come. And just to clarify - they didn't actually do the sacrament, that line is just in there because it's what's always in the program. The part that blows my mind is how he got his program formatted so nicely without taking forever. Because let's face it - it would take me an hour to figure out how to get the justification so nice!

Lige just told me - they invited President Monson to speak because Sam didn't want to hear a talk he'd already heard, so they went to the general conference from the time before he was born, and picked one from someone he hardly remembers, just so he wouldn't complain that it was boring :)

So, they had pretend Sacrament Meeting, then they had pretend Primary. Jane told me all about it when she woke up - she was a big kid and got to go to PRIMARY today! For Primary, she got to take a nap! It was so exciting. I think she mentioned it about 10 times.

And, I get the Motherly Intuition Award for the day - when Jane woke up from her nap, she had a fever. Look who was so smart to leave her home, even though she wasn't sick yet!

So, sign us up for another week of quarantine. Hopefully this one is the last one...

The ASL Bee

Are you ready to hear about our new ASL learning initiative?

It's so easy to let yourself plateau in a language. Especially for the little kids, who don't feel the weight of an injunction from God Himself to learn ASL. Coming up with creative ways to keep us learning is what I do for fun :)

So right now, we're working on vocabulary. We found word lists for ASL 1-4 at www.lifeprint.com, complete with links to videos of the signs, and we put them in a spreadsheet. On Monday night, we're having an ASL Bee! Our first one was yesterday. We run it just like a spelling bee, only you have to sign the word instead of spelling it.

Yesterday pitted the younger kids (Sam, Martha and Jane) against each other, then the big kids (Lige, Ellis, Lillian and Marriner.) (Sorry, that was a bit of mom-snark.) The little kid bee was pretty fast, but I'd like to note that Jane didn't get out until the 4th round, correctly signing "me", "nice" and "yes" right before getting out. I didn't try to give her easy words, but we were using the ASL 1 word list for the littles. Sam and Martha did really well on nouns, but they got out on pronouns. That was a good thing for us to talk about, anyway. Martha eventually won for getting "you (plural)" after Sam had missed it. High five to smarty-pants four-year-old!

In the big kid category, we randomized the entire word list. Lige got out the first round on "rollerblade". Which I felt bad about, because when was the last time you used that in a sentence? Marriner and Lillian were the finalists, and Lillian might have won when Marriner signed "poor" instead of "pour", but Mom accidentally showed the right sign instead of letting Lillian have a chance. But she admitted that she didn't know the answer, anyway. Marriner finally won. High five to smarty-pants forty-year-old! :) (As of 2 weeks ago...)

And we'll see who takes home the trophy next week!

Sunday brought some more to the story of the Temple Recommend Renewal. After church, Marriner said, "Guess what, MY temple recommend expires this month, too!" Duh, don't know why we didn't figure that out earlier, we always go together to get ours renewed. So then he asked the big question: "Who interviews me?" In a ward, anyone in the bishopric can do a temple interview. In a branch, only the branch president. Who interviews the branch president? We indulged in a little guessing, then arrived at the practical solution: go read the handbook.

Interestingly, the handbook didn't have any answers. But my grandma told me that when they were called as mission president, Grandpa signed his own TR. And we found out, that's how it goes with the branch president - he signs his own recommend. So Marriner went up to his room and had a little interview with himself. A visit with the stake presidency for the second half of TR interview, and we're ready to go to the temple!

The TR interview

We went to the temple last weekend, and I noticed that my recommend was about to expire. That was more emotional than I expected - I got it renewed last 2 years ago, only a month before we were called to join the branch.

First, let me explain temples and temple recommends a bit. Members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints go to temples to do ordinances. To keep them a very special and holy place, we're required to be spiritually prepared and worthy to go. Every two years, we meet with our bishop and stake president and answer questions showing that we're keeping the basic commandments. For example, "Do you have a testimony that Jesus Christ is our savior?" and "Do you keep the law of chastity?" It's a cool experience to sit down with a representative of the Lord and be able to say, "Yes, I am living the commandments you've asked me to live." And then to have that representative of the Lord tell you that even though you're not perfect, you're worthy to enter the House of the Lord. And if I had messed something up, that same person would help me change my life and repent, so I could get back on track. I know some people think the idea of temple recommends is a little strange, but I really love it!

So 2 years ago, just before our lives were about to change, I met with my bishop, then a member of the stake presidency and got a new temple recommend. I wonder if President Williams looked at me when he met with me and thought, "Oh, this girl's life is about to change big-time..." Maybe he didn't know yet.

After Marriner was called as branch president, we learned some interesting things. In a ward (a full-sized congregation) the bishop or his counselors can do temple recommend interviews. In fact, when Marriner was a counselor once, that was a lot of his job. The bishop is usually saved for first-timers or people with particular concerns or issues. But in a branch, the counselors don't have the same authority as a bishopric, and only the branch president can do temple recommends. We sorta laughed that in a couple of years, I would have to have an interview with my husband, no other options! I like my husband, but I think that if he was a bishop, he would have had me interviewed by one of his counselors, just to preserve that feeling of...I dunno...separation between church and state??

So now the two years has passed! Sunday night, I went down to the family room and said, "Marriner, what's the most convenient way for me to get an appointment with the branch president for a temple recommend interview?"

"Umm...can we talk after I finish a phone call I'm waiting for?"

Woohoo, that was easy :)

When it came time for the interview, Lige was rushing around getting stuff put together for band camp in the morning. Our house doesn't have an abundance of rooms with doors (and I truly love my open floor plan - it's just bad for privacy) so we ended up in our bedroom. I threw all the laundry spread on the floor into a basket to try to make it a bit more branch president's office-y. It was moderately successful.

I know the question you're all asking is did we do the interview in sign language or English? Well, we did it in English. It was the end of a busy day, and honestly, ASL just takes longer than English. I know, cop out.

The interview itself was very special. It's really cool to be able to tell your priesthood leader that you are being honest and honorable. But this interview had double meaning - not only was I telling my priesthood leader, but I was telling my husband. It was a very sweet spirit as I told my priesthood leader and my husband that I am faithful to my marriage covenant. And that there is nothing in relation to my family that is contrary to the teachings of Jesus Christ. It felt very vulnerable - which reminded me that I had complete and total trust in my partner in life and eternity.

Despite the tender moments, it required great restraint to refrain from cracking inside jokes. "Do you strive to attend all your church meetings?" "Oh gosh, honey, it's fully of strife, you know as well as I do!" No, I did not say that. Because I'm mature. (cough, cough...)

Now that the interview is over, I can go back to my normal behavior around my husband...like nagging him until he remembers to fill out my recommend form and give it to me...I guess that's the only downside to having your priesthood leader be your husband :)

The hottest Trek ever!

Marriner and I seem to be forming a habit of forsaking our children and vacation time to go be "Ma and Pa" at our stake youth conference. I won't try to hide that it's one of our favorite things to do. The youth are so wonderful to work with, and it's amazing to do something that might actually make a big difference in someone's life. I know some of my youth conference experiences were really important to me as a teenager.

Every 4 years, our stake does the dreaded, feared, and anticipated Pioneer TREK. A friend described it well: we take all the youth out to the mountains and LARP :) (Old people - that means "Live Action Role Play.) In the 1850's, some fabulously faithful and determined members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints actually pulled hand carts of all their worldly goods from Nebraska to Salt Lake City to escape persecution and gather with the Saints. They couldn't afford wagons. It was a heroic and faith-promoting journey, and getting a taste for what they went through for the gospel of Jesus Christ is a life-changing experience.

Although I love going to youth conference, I was pretty scared to go on this one because I knew that it involved a lot of walking in the middle of summer. My knees are prone to fussiness, and I haven't really exercised for the last 15 years of childbearing...and I was scared! I tried to do as much walking as I could to get ready, but as the day came closer, it was clear the weather was not going to cooperate with us.

Every year in Washington, we get a few miserable days in which the forecasters tell everyone to just stay inside, and the county opens cooling centers for people without A/C. And look at us, we decided to spend those days out pulling hand carts!

But, as always seems to happen, we got a family group of the best youth in the whole stake. It's magical, the way you are filled with love for kids you've never met before. Their good qualities just shine, even in their tough moments. God is real, guys, because it's not possible to love a group of teenagers like that without the influence of the Holy Ghost.

Our family had to create a cheer, and Marriner and I foisted a cheer on them - "We're grateful for this experience!" It was a good thing to cheer. We cheered it when we had blisters, when we accidentally slept on a cow pie, when we were walking in the dark with no end in sight, when we arrived at camp and had to start a fire before we could eat, and we were exhausted, when they made us put salt in our water because people were getting sick from losing electrolytes...and mostly, when we were SO. HOT. All these experiences were no fun, but we remembered why we were there, and were grateful to get to experience them. At least, I hope they're grateful for them now...I'm pretty sure our cheer had an air of propaganda at times while we were there.... :)

But I have to say, the real reason we love doing youth conference, the thing that keeps us volunteering every year (even though we don't volunteer in our church!) is getting to hang out with the most amazing adults in Southern Maryland. If we took all these same people and went to a party together, it would be fun, but not particularly meaningful. But when we go out and work together to teach the gospel to our youth, it is so amazing. The strength my testimony and commitment to follow Jesus gains from a few days with other people who love the Lord with all their hearts is immeasurable. I am so touched by their examples. And I'm full of love for them and the blessing of having such people lead my children.

On Sunday, our new Stake President sat down and talked to me for maybe half an hour. He'd been assigned by someone above him to meet with the wives of all the bishops/branch presidents and make sure they were doing ok, and that their husbands were treating them right :) I came out of the meeting just feeling great. I realized it was this same thing - the wonderful feeling of being with other people who are trying to serve the Lord. Knowing that Marriner and I are giving our all, but there are lots of other people out there giving their all, and we're all looking out for each other. 

I feel that way about our branch, too. People talk a lot about feeling a special spirit in our branch. Part of that, I'm sure, is the experience of worshiping in a different way. But honestly, part of that is being with a bunch of people who drive past several other churches every week to come to the church where they can give their best to the Lord. And people who all come together with their one Deaf family member, instead of just going to the ward that would be more convenient for the rest of them. They're all sacrificing, and it gives us a certain special portion of strength and unity. 

On a totally different note...it was Fast Sunday this last week, which is a week where we all fast for 2 meals, then in Sacrament meeting people have an opportunity to share testimonies with each other. I generally enjoy bearing my testimony, but I've struggled with it a bit lately, and I finally realized why this week. I debated with myself a long time about whether to bear my testimony, and what to say, and finally I decided to do it. When I sat down, I was frustrated that I hadn't really expressed what was in my heart very well. In English, I'm good with words and can put feelings into sentences fairly well. And it turns out, I have a little pride there. I like feeling like my words are influential. And when I come away feeling like my words didn't have much convincing power, I feel frustrated. So the next month, I try again. And it's still less than what is in my heart. And I get frustrated again. In our previous ward, there was a sister who was a native Spanish speaker who bore her testimony every month, even though it was never very eloquent. I wonder if she just wished every month that she could express herself better. 

Children's progress

Some of the little kids have been doing interesting things lately. Thought I'd write them down so I can look back and remember.

Jane has, until now, had a funny habit. Say it's signing time, and she talks to me. So I sign, "Signing time, no talking!" So she stops talking and starts whispering. I don't know why kids do this - all three of the younger ones have done the same thing. ANYWAY, this week, in addition to whispering, she'll sometimes start babbling with her hands. She waves them around for a few seconds, then looks at you, expecting an answer. I usually sign, "Oh, I see" back to her, and she looks happy at my response and babbles some more. Totes adorbs.

Sam's been doing something interesting, too. When he was younger, he signed very naturally, and very much the way a deaf person would sign - very visually. Obviously, not totally like a deaf person - he's limited by the quality of role models he gets - but still very visually. Then he learned to read. I hear from other parents that this happens to their kids too - when they learn to read, they forget how to sign ASL and start trying to sign every word, exactly like English. (Ha ha, I'm remembering the time a kid in the branch - who, interestingly, had just learned to read - signed, "I want 2 B a (fingerspelled) h-e-l-p-e-r." I about died. Now I get it. It's what happens when you learn to read!)

The fun thing I'm seeing Sam do is start to go back to some ASL things. Today he was praying something about people all over the world, and he drew the world with his hand and pointed to all the people all around it. Isn't that so much more pleasant than finger spelling "a-l-l a-r--o-u-n-d t-h-e w-o-r-l-d"? (Answer: yes.) (And yes, he would have finger-spelled all those things, even though he knows the signs for all and world.)

Name sign difficulties

We gave our kids name signs a long time ago. It was long before we joined the branch, or had any Deaf friends. We just needed names for our kids, and so we gave them some.

Usually, a sign name should be given by a Deaf person. We knew that. But, some of our Deaf friends have been very kind to point out, parents have the prerogative to name their own kids. So we don't feel too bad about it. Still, some of our picks are a little unusual, and confuse people sometimes.

So, now that we're a little smarter, we're thinking about changing some of our kids' name signs.

A lot of families will have a family theme. For example, each kid's initial on the same part of the face. Like tapping their initial on the chin or the cheekbone. In our family, Ellis's name sign is our favorite - an E on the chin, like the sign for "mom" with an E. (If you know Ellis, you can guess why she got that sign! She loves being the mom!!)

www.lifeprint.com

So, I had this thought yesterday that we could do all our kids on the chin. And it could be so awesome, because an L under the chin means "pogi" in the Philippines - pogi means guwapo. Hot stuff. All that and a bag of chips. Perfect sign for Lige!

See! Isn't that a pogi fellow ^^ :)

So, I showed it to Marriner. His face immediately showed that it wasn't a great idea. I was so let down! Why not, I asked.

Well, in ASL it means Lesbian.

Oh well. Guess we'll let that one go.

The signs you wish you never had to use...

We had a party at Activity Days yesterday! It was an obstacle course, and it was super-fun. Other than the trampoline accident after the party, we had a blast. We had popsicles and a closing prayer before everyone went home.

Looking back, I'm shocked this hasn't happened yet in the year and a half we've been doing Activity Days. It's just so obvious, given a bunch of little boys who know their parents can't hear them. Any group of 4 boys would do the same thing. Boys! Ah!

Someone let loose the biggest fart I've ever heard in the middle of the prayer.

These guys are good - they know how to giggle and talk without moving around a lot so their parents (who are all watching the prayer) won't see them. :)

Finally, I had to stop the prayer and address the problem. Because there are some times when you just shouldn't be trying to talk to God :) Of course, even though the kids and I all knew why we were stopping and trying again, I had to explain to everyone else. And that was when I was grateful I'd seen the sign for fart.

Boys.

Addendum:

Gotta add to this story. I texted the mom of the boy who got hurt on the trampoline yesterday to make sure he was ok. We were worried he might have gotten a bit of a concussion. She said he was fine, which she credits to the prayer of faith that opened our activity. I'd totally forgotten about the opening prayer! The prayer, in its entirety, was:

"Father, bless that nobody will die on the trampoline, Amen."

Boys.

Empathy for a native Spanish speaker

My son Lige picked up a couple of new piano students. I know the mom and dad from the school book fair. They're native Spanish speakers, but have been in the US a long time and are pretty much fluent in English. Today, Grandma brought the kids to lessons, so I got to meet her. She's been here a while, but she's at home all day with little kids as the designated kid watcher. Thus, she's not so good at English. When they showed up, I sat down to talk with her for a few minutes while Lige taught. I planned to go get some work done after being polite, but something in the way she talked made me think that maybe she really wanted to practice English. It struck a chord of empathy in me. I want to be better at ASL. But I'm home all day with little kids, and just don't get to talk to native speakers very often, either. So in my head, I realized that staying and talking would be an appreciated service. We sat down and got to know each other. I tried using all the things my Deaf friends do for me - slowing down, helping her learn new words when she was trying to express new things she didn't know the word for, avoiding hard words, stuff like that. It's not easy to have a conversation that way. My brain wanted to go faster or change to something more fast-paced. But I made myself slow down and enjoy the conversation in honor of all the patient people who have done that for me :)

It ended up being a neat experience. I told her about how I was sympathetic to her language struggles because I had the same thing at church, and told her a bit of our story. I asked her if she went to church, and she said she was frustrated with her church and looking for a new one. I told her we had some missionaries that could come tell her about our church (in Spanish, even!) if she was interested, and she was as excited about that as anyone I've ever seen. It made me grin that our little conversation made her so happy. I spent a year and a half as a missionary in the Philippines, and I don't think I ever saw anyone who was so excited to talk to some missionaries before. So we picked up the phone and called the missionaries right then.

So, I was glad I took the time to talk. She was looking for some English conversation and a good place to go to church, and I could help with both of those interests. Because really, I do go to a pretty fabulous church.

ASL Camp

I have a busy week this week, so I asked Ellis to guest post for me, and report on Young Men's and Young Women's camp! Since our branch has 9 teenagers (6 girls, 3 boys) they co-located the YM and YW camp, and did many of their activities together. The coolest part of the camp to me was that it was done 100% in ASL. Talking was not allowed. Everyone had several clothespins on their shirt, and if anyone heard you say anything, they got to take your clothespin. Of course, the people with the fewest clothespins at the end of the day had to do something humiliating (namely, do the "I'm a star!" move 5 times in front of everyone. I'd never heard of it before, but it was pretty fabulous.) So everyone was voices-off. They had some foam dice around camp that you could throw at people to get their attention. Sam and Martha are enjoying having those around the house now!

So, without further ado, here is Ellis's fabulous report on Girls Camp!

Learning a language fast!

My parents got a mission call a few weeks ago to serve in the Paris France temple visitor's center. I am so stinkin' excited for them! It is pretty much an open secret that the thing I've looked forward to most since I came home from my mission is when I get to go on a mission again! And the senior missionaries have such interesting service opportunities! I can barely wait. (Ok, I almost said, "I literally can't wait." But then I caught myself. Phew.)

Anyway, I digress. My parents. Going to Paris. For 2 years. The point is that they are in urgent need of brushing up their French skills. So I've been thinking a lot about how to get to conversational in a language you already sorta know. (I've got experience in this, it turns out.) So here's what I do if I was going to Paris. (Or if I got a re-do on our assignment to the ASL branch.)

1. Wonder why on earth I was re-learning French when I'm way better at 3 other languages now...so good thing it's not actually me going to Paris :) (I took French in High School and a semester in college. But once I learned Tagalog, I never looked back. (Except for the few months before we went to Montreal as a family.) It turns out that once you stop having to conjugate, you have no desire to ever do that again. ANYWAY...
2. I'd use the language as much as I could. When I learned Tagalog, they advised that we never say a word in English if we knew it in Tagalog. You have to actually be using the language for your brain to start processing things in that language. So I would say that during dinner, or before noon, or whatever, French only in the house. Get that tongue in shape! :)
3. Listen to/watch the language as much as I could. Your brain needs some time to start to hear the different words, to take in the patterns of the language. When we learned ASL, we talked a lot among ourselves, but I did not appreciate how important it is to watch native signers and learn how it looks when done right. So I'd start watching the news in French on YouTube, or start watching a French sitcom (Asterix?....). I'd start listening to General Conference talks in French, or maybe find a podcast for kids that was simple enough for me to understand. I'd try to get as much of that sound into my head as I could.
4. Pray more, because God doesn't help if we try to do it ourselves.

After Marriner was called as branch president, we had 3 weeks of calm before the storm. Our biggest focus was learning as much sign language as we could before our feet hit the ground and we had to start focusing on other things. Looking back, that was a really special time for our family. Not everyone was completely sold on the idea of learning sign language really fast, but in general, we felt a need to work as hard as we could, and we felt the Spirit teaching us things we couldn't have imagined just a few weeks before. Working hand-in-hand with the Spirit to be ready for our assignment built our faith in ways that really boosted us through the first few crazy months.

Who knows when you may be have the chance to learn a language in the service of the Lord. But I hope when you do, you cast aside your feelings of inadequacy and just focus on being the best you can to bless God's children. My parents have always been such fabulous examples of this to me. I can't wait to see the ways they are blessed as they brush up their French and take off to serve! My willingness to learn a language for the Lord comes from their great example. And I'm proud to come from such a family.

The stubbed toe

A really interesting thing happened last week after church. The kids went to play in the church gym while I talked to some people after church, and 10 minutes later Martha came back crying with a bleeding toe. I guess she sorta got it closed in a door. One of the branch dads who is deaf was down watching the kids, but didn't see the accident. He just got a crying 4-yr old. He tried to comfort her and she kept saying things to him (probably, "I want my mom!") but he can't hear her. He tried and tried and tried to get her to sign what she wanted, but she just cried and wailed. Finally, someone came and got me, and I calmed her down.

I pondered over this all week. Sure, Martha can sign. But in her moment of crisis, she couldn't do it. She was just frozen, and all she could do was process the language she learned to think in. I thought about the branch dad who helped Martha - do his kids sign when they're hurt? Does having a deaf dad get ASL deeper into your brain than having a family that signs for a little bit every day?

Gah, language acquisition is so darn fascinating.

And, Martha's toe was fine. And she got to ride the stroller back to the car, since she had a bandaid on her toe, so she thought that was pretty great. Jane loved getting to walk. So it all worked out in the end.