Saturday, August 5, 2023

It's over

 As I typed, "It's over" in the blog title, my mind flashed back to the end of my mission. I was so miserable to be going home. I cried and cried as we flew over the mountains into Salt Lake City. I ended up going home about a month earlier than I was expecting, and 2 months before I was hoping. :) It was just the way the timing worked out with the number of incoming missionaries. But I wanted to stay in Manila forever, and even though I knew 18 months was all I got, it wasn't easy when that time came. I felt like my heart was being cut in two, half of it staying in Manila. And somehow I was supposed to go home and act normal. 

This time in the branch has been so much like a mission for our family. Our wonderful, extra long mission where we got to learn a language and be part of another culture, all without packing a single suitcase. We hoped it would last forever, we might have even prepared speeches in our heads to give the stake president about why he should keep us assigned to the branch...but in the end, it was moot. 

So, here I am in my living room. There's a ceiling-high row of boxes behind me, a room full of boxes below me, and a mattress on the floor above me. We're moving this week. And I feel just like I did flying home from Manila. My heart has been cut in half. How do other people do this? 

Our sweet friends Meredith and Julia put together a farewell party for us tomorrow. Marriner and I are both pretty sure it's going to be one of the hardest things we've ever done. But also, it feels so special to know that we've done enough good in the world that people want to throw us a goodbye party! :) We're really touched that someone would take time out of their busy lives to plan that for us! Last Sunday, having some extra free time, we practiced some family songs we could "carol" to our friends one last time. 

On that note, Marriner was released last week. Actually, I was released as seminary teacher, too. It caught me off-guard when they started stake business and my name came out first. :) I followed Marriner's advice to keep my testimony short - the new people were the real stars of the show. I couldn't help but contrast my first testimony and last testimony. Both were hard! The first time, because I couldn't express what was in my heart. And the last time, because I couldn't express what was in my heart. For two totally different reasons! There's just no way to share the things one feels at the end of such a journey.

Kylie bore a sweet and hilarious testimony as the wife of the new branch president. She shared a lot of stories about us, actually, and concluded with, "I feel like Harry Potter when Dumbledore dies and leaves him all alone to figure it out himself." I laughed at being likened to Dumbledore - first time that's ever happened! Fortunately, the interpreter missed some of that, and the stake president doesn't know I'm secretly an old man. :) All the testimonies were so beautiful, and I feel like the branch is in the hands of good, mature, knowledgeable and humble men of God. It was definitely a day to remember! One of my favorite parts was in the 5th Sunday lesson, while I was teaching, Marriner came in late. I greeted him, "Welcome, BROTHER Merrill!"

Tomorrow we go to church with no responsibilities at all! Neither of us is teaching or leading anything!

Today, some friends came over and helped break down beds and such. It's amazing how much less stressful moving is with friends to help. Again, just so amazed that people think we're worth giving up their time for! Because they're not doing it because we need it - they're just doing it because they love us. As I was typing this, I was grateful for Kylie, who took down our computers and packed them - and by the end, the internet still works! :) 

Oh - I should mention, we're not ACTUALLY done with everything in the branch - we can't leave until after church next week. Lige has to give his mission farewell talk. :) After that, we'll drive north. For good.