More of the ASL Bee and General Conference

The ASL Bee is still popular in our family. I don't know that many people study or anything, but Martha, Jane and I do study sometimes during lunch. This, and the fact that Martha pays attention to things, has set up a fierce rivalry in the little kid division.

Martha won the first 3 weeks. Jane is doing a great job, too, never winning, but actually knowing a lot of the words she gets. Sam doesn't like this. So he's actually started trying at something, which is not his usual M.O. :) But last night, he won the coveted ice cream bar! Woohoo!!

Jane and Martha are both very reluctant to express themselves in sign language. They understand what you say to them, as evidenced by their obedience, or the way they whisper back their response. (Gah! Why do my kids think whispering is the right way to communicate when everyone is signing?!? Anyway...) But getting them to sign back is tough. It turns out, they totally know the signs. I asked Martha this week how to sign "idea" and Jane totally knew it. That's not really a 2-yr old word. Except she's so funny - everything you sign with a pinkie, she does with her thumb. Like her name - wave her thumb, then "e". I remember Martha doing this, too, actually, now that I think of it...

Actually, we practiced the manual alphabet the other day. I spelled, Jane told me what the letters were. "A-B-C-D-Jane."

We watched General Conference this weekend in ASL with the sound on. Because we like the English :) Marriner wanted to watch one session with the sound off, so he went upstairs and watched the General Women's Session by himself. It makes us happy that my sister who lives nearby also turns on the ASL. It's good. But it had a funny down-side this year.

President Merrill and Bishop Harris, of the hearing ward, challenged the Seminary kids to General Conference jeopardy. Losers cook breakfast. The kids were determined to beat the bishops, and payed attention like I've never seen teenagers do before. But seriously, Marriner and Bishop Harris are bright guys, and I didn't give the kids much chance of winning. So last night, I was quizzing Marriner about talks to get him ready, and he was sorta struggling to remember who'd said what. Finally he confessed, "I can only picture the interpreter!" Will it make a difference? Will the kids come home with glory and honor? I won't know until Lige gets home from school, because nobody sent me a text after Seminary bragging. :)

A testimony to my son

A very public meltdown during the Sacrament on Sunday revealed to the world that Sam's struggling a little bit right now with a lot of emotions. We've had a couple of rough weeks where Sam has been angry at a lot of things, and we're both feeling pretty exhausted by it. I'm exhausted at trying to be a good mom in the face of great temptation to smack my kid, and Sam's exhausted at always being in trouble, and feeling like he can never succeed. I think everyone else in the family is tired of having to take care of their own problems while Sam and I work on his. So, it's been rough on all of us.

Sam lost his temper again this morning, and after finally calming down, he cried and hugged me and said, "It doesn't matter how hard I try, I can't do things right. I don't have any choice." As I hugged him, I felt all of his despair. We sat in the rocking chair, and I told him a story. "Long, long ago, we lived in heaven with our Heavenly Father. He told us that we needed to go to earth to progress. And someone named Satan said, 'I will make it so everyone has to be good, and they can all come back to heaven.'" Sam didn't like that idea, because of all the people I know, Sam values his freedom to choose the most. "Then someone else named Jesus Christ stood up and said, 'I will pay the punishment for everyone's mistakes so that everyone can choose for themselves.'" Tears came to my eyes as I told Sam that I know life is hard, but Jesus Christ had given him a fabulous gift: the power to overcome ANY problem he had in life. I felt it as strong as anything I've ever felt before - we (every. single. one. of. us, even Sam) CAN overcome ANY problem we have. The moment I said it, I knew it was completely true.

Think of it: we have the power to choose for ourselves. No thing or person can make us be the way we don't want to be, because of our Savior, Jesus Christ. And that's just fabulously amazing to me today. I'm really grateful for that beautiful moment of clarity in the midst of a tough morning.

Choose good, all y'all. Even if it's hard.

More kid funnies

You know, learning a language requires going out on a limb a lot, and that means you make mistakes. And mistakes are sometimes funny. So I don't want my kids to think (when they grow up and found out that I wrote all this stuff about them) that I'm making fun of them. I'm just keeping a sense of humor about our life adventures! And I'll say, especially in praying, it's so easy to get in a rut and just say the same things over and over. So kudos to my kids for trying to say new things!

On Saturday, Sam was anticipating the start of school after the weekend and tried to sign, "Please bless the start of school." But he couldn't quite remember how start goes...so he did the best he remembered, and instead signed, "Please bless school to hurt."

__________

We were on the way home from that only-somewhat-painful first day of school drop-off when Martha saw a dog in a car and thought that was sort of cool. This blew my mind, because Martha has traditionally had about the same opinion of dogs as she does of spinach, bears or martians: they are definitely to be avoided. I asked, "Do you want to have a dog for our car, too?"

"No, we should get a dog for our yard, and then we can take it in the car when we want to. But not a dog, a puppy. Because a puppy is a baby dog. They're small."

(Mom is thinking, yeah right you'd like a puppy. They're really hyper and would scare you to DEATH.")

"Hey, Mom! I know how to sign baby dog! You sign baby, then dog!"

She was very proud of herself :)

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I read an alphabet book to Jane today. I said the letter, and signed it, too. She's getting pretty good at her letters, so when we got to "e" I said, "What letter is this?" She looked at my hand and triumphantly declared, "Jane!"

See, when we spell her name, J-A-N-E, she just sees the E at the end. So she thinks E is Jane.

How cool is that, she has a letter of the alphabet named after her!

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So, I did something I know I shouldn't do this week. I was talking to some friends, and they used a sign I didn't know, and I was sorta losing track of the conversation, and I was a little tired...so I just smiled and nodded a bit. Usually the conversation comes back to something I understand, and I can rejoin pretty quickly. But suddenly, one of the ladies turned to me and signed, "Do you like (the word I didn't know.)? Gah, I was caught! I'd been here nodding like I was totally following the conversation, and now I had to confess that I didn't have a clue what they were talking about.

It was sushi.

And, yes I like some sushi, but no, I'm not totally in love with it like some people are. Just in case you're wondering, like my friends probably still are, because it took so long for me to figure out what they were talking about that the conversation sorta broke down. :) But it's ok, we're in Primary together, so they have to talk to me again. Bwahaha :)

Pretend church

Our family has been going through the WORST cold I think we've ever had. Oh, my sweet Ellis, who got sick the day after we got home from our family reunion. Her Grandpa got something that sounded exactly the same. We thought it was strep throat, because her throat was so sore and she had a fever. But she also had a cough like nobody's business. And, the strep test came back negative, so guess it wasn't. But it was as bad as strep, anyway.

Two long weeks of Ellis being sick - a week of fever and headache and cough, then an ear infection! And literally the day she starts to feel better, Lige and Lillian get a sore throat...

Friday, Sam got it.

Yesterday, we discussed who would go to church and who would stay home. Lige volunteered to babysit, since he was still feeling too lousy to go to church, but well enough to take care of everyone else. And we decided to leave Jane home. Because, even if she wasn't sick yet, she was certainly contagious, and shouldn't go to Nursery. So today, I went to church with just Martha and Ellis. It was quite lonely feeling!

It turns out that Martha still doesn't like sitting on the pew, even without anyone else to bug her :) Otherwise, church was awfully relaxing. We got home to everyone watching a church movie, and Jane taking a nap. I went down and said hi, and asked how church had been. Our family has a long-held tradition when people are sick of Pretend Church. This was just the first time they've had Pretend Church without any parents involved :)

Lige got pretty into it. He printed a program. I found it on the ground and slipped it into my pocket to keep forever, because it's adorable :) We always invite someone cool to be the speaker at our pretend church, and Lige went above and beyond this time by inviting someone who...well...is coming all the way from the other side of the veil to speak to our family :) It was awfully nice of President Monson to come visit us!

Something new this time was inviting the entire Tabernacle Choir to church. That was nice of them to come. And just to clarify - they didn't actually do the sacrament, that line is just in there because it's what's always in the program. The part that blows my mind is how he got his program formatted so nicely without taking forever. Because let's face it - it would take me an hour to figure out how to get the justification so nice!

Lige just told me - they invited President Monson to speak because Sam didn't want to hear a talk he'd already heard, so they went to the general conference from the time before he was born, and picked one from someone he hardly remembers, just so he wouldn't complain that it was boring :)

So, they had pretend Sacrament Meeting, then they had pretend Primary. Jane told me all about it when she woke up - she was a big kid and got to go to PRIMARY today! For Primary, she got to take a nap! It was so exciting. I think she mentioned it about 10 times.

And, I get the Motherly Intuition Award for the day - when Jane woke up from her nap, she had a fever. Look who was so smart to leave her home, even though she wasn't sick yet!

So, sign us up for another week of quarantine. Hopefully this one is the last one...

The ASL Bee

Are you ready to hear about our new ASL learning initiative?

It's so easy to let yourself plateau in a language. Especially for the little kids, who don't feel the weight of an injunction from God Himself to learn ASL. Coming up with creative ways to keep us learning is what I do for fun :)

So right now, we're working on vocabulary. We found word lists for ASL 1-4 at www.lifeprint.com, complete with links to videos of the signs, and we put them in a spreadsheet. On Monday night, we're having an ASL Bee! Our first one was yesterday. We run it just like a spelling bee, only you have to sign the word instead of spelling it.

Yesterday pitted the younger kids (Sam, Martha and Jane) against each other, then the big kids (Lige, Ellis, Lillian and Marriner.) (Sorry, that was a bit of mom-snark.) The little kid bee was pretty fast, but I'd like to note that Jane didn't get out until the 4th round, correctly signing "me", "nice" and "yes" right before getting out. I didn't try to give her easy words, but we were using the ASL 1 word list for the littles. Sam and Martha did really well on nouns, but they got out on pronouns. That was a good thing for us to talk about, anyway. Martha eventually won for getting "you (plural)" after Sam had missed it. High five to smarty-pants four-year-old!

In the big kid category, we randomized the entire word list. Lige got out the first round on "rollerblade". Which I felt bad about, because when was the last time you used that in a sentence? Marriner and Lillian were the finalists, and Lillian might have won when Marriner signed "poor" instead of "pour", but Mom accidentally showed the right sign instead of letting Lillian have a chance. But she admitted that she didn't know the answer, anyway. Marriner finally won. High five to smarty-pants forty-year-old! :) (As of 2 weeks ago...)

And we'll see who takes home the trophy next week!

Sunday brought some more to the story of the Temple Recommend Renewal. After church, Marriner said, "Guess what, MY temple recommend expires this month, too!" Duh, don't know why we didn't figure that out earlier, we always go together to get ours renewed. So then he asked the big question: "Who interviews me?" In a ward, anyone in the bishopric can do a temple interview. In a branch, only the branch president. Who interviews the branch president? We indulged in a little guessing, then arrived at the practical solution: go read the handbook.

Interestingly, the handbook didn't have any answers. But my grandma told me that when they were called as mission president, Grandpa signed his own TR. And we found out, that's how it goes with the branch president - he signs his own recommend. So Marriner went up to his room and had a little interview with himself. A visit with the stake presidency for the second half of TR interview, and we're ready to go to the temple!

The TR interview

We went to the temple last weekend, and I noticed that my recommend was about to expire. That was more emotional than I expected - I got it renewed last 2 years ago, only a month before we were called to join the branch.

First, let me explain temples and temple recommends a bit. Members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints go to temples to do ordinances. To keep them a very special and holy place, we're required to be spiritually prepared and worthy to go. Every two years, we meet with our bishop and stake president and answer questions showing that we're keeping the basic commandments. For example, "Do you have a testimony that Jesus Christ is our savior?" and "Do you keep the law of chastity?" It's a cool experience to sit down with a representative of the Lord and be able to say, "Yes, I am living the commandments you've asked me to live." And then to have that representative of the Lord tell you that even though you're not perfect, you're worthy to enter the House of the Lord. And if I had messed something up, that same person would help me change my life and repent, so I could get back on track. I know some people think the idea of temple recommends is a little strange, but I really love it!

So 2 years ago, just before our lives were about to change, I met with my bishop, then a member of the stake presidency and got a new temple recommend. I wonder if President Williams looked at me when he met with me and thought, "Oh, this girl's life is about to change big-time..." Maybe he didn't know yet.

After Marriner was called as branch president, we learned some interesting things. In a ward (a full-sized congregation) the bishop or his counselors can do temple recommend interviews. In fact, when Marriner was a counselor once, that was a lot of his job. The bishop is usually saved for first-timers or people with particular concerns or issues. But in a branch, the counselors don't have the same authority as a bishopric, and only the branch president can do temple recommends. We sorta laughed that in a couple of years, I would have to have an interview with my husband, no other options! I like my husband, but I think that if he was a bishop, he would have had me interviewed by one of his counselors, just to preserve that feeling of...I dunno...separation between church and state??

So now the two years has passed! Sunday night, I went down to the family room and said, "Marriner, what's the most convenient way for me to get an appointment with the branch president for a temple recommend interview?"

"Umm...can we talk after I finish a phone call I'm waiting for?"

Woohoo, that was easy :)

When it came time for the interview, Lige was rushing around getting stuff put together for band camp in the morning. Our house doesn't have an abundance of rooms with doors (and I truly love my open floor plan - it's just bad for privacy) so we ended up in our bedroom. I threw all the laundry spread on the floor into a basket to try to make it a bit more branch president's office-y. It was moderately successful.

I know the question you're all asking is did we do the interview in sign language or English? Well, we did it in English. It was the end of a busy day, and honestly, ASL just takes longer than English. I know, cop out.

The interview itself was very special. It's really cool to be able to tell your priesthood leader that you are being honest and honorable. But this interview had double meaning - not only was I telling my priesthood leader, but I was telling my husband. It was a very sweet spirit as I told my priesthood leader and my husband that I am faithful to my marriage covenant. And that there is nothing in relation to my family that is contrary to the teachings of Jesus Christ. It felt very vulnerable - which reminded me that I had complete and total trust in my partner in life and eternity.

Despite the tender moments, it required great restraint to refrain from cracking inside jokes. "Do you strive to attend all your church meetings?" "Oh gosh, honey, it's fully of strife, you know as well as I do!" No, I did not say that. Because I'm mature. (cough, cough...)

Now that the interview is over, I can go back to my normal behavior around my husband...like nagging him until he remembers to fill out my recommend form and give it to me...I guess that's the only downside to having your priesthood leader be your husband :)

The hottest Trek ever!

Marriner and I seem to be forming a habit of forsaking our children and vacation time to go be "Ma and Pa" at our stake youth conference. I won't try to hide that it's one of our favorite things to do. The youth are so wonderful to work with, and it's amazing to do something that might actually make a big difference in someone's life. I know some of my youth conference experiences were really important to me as a teenager.

Every 4 years, our stake does the dreaded, feared, and anticipated Pioneer TREK. A friend described it well: we take all the youth out to the mountains and LARP :) (Old people - that means "Live Action Role Play.) In the 1850's, some fabulously faithful and determined members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints actually pulled hand carts of all their worldly goods from Nebraska to Salt Lake City to escape persecution and gather with the Saints. They couldn't afford wagons. It was a heroic and faith-promoting journey, and getting a taste for what they went through for the gospel of Jesus Christ is a life-changing experience.

Although I love going to youth conference, I was pretty scared to go on this one because I knew that it involved a lot of walking in the middle of summer. My knees are prone to fussiness, and I haven't really exercised for the last 15 years of childbearing...and I was scared! I tried to do as much walking as I could to get ready, but as the day came closer, it was clear the weather was not going to cooperate with us.

Every year in Washington, we get a few miserable days in which the forecasters tell everyone to just stay inside, and the county opens cooling centers for people without A/C. And look at us, we decided to spend those days out pulling hand carts!

But, as always seems to happen, we got a family group of the best youth in the whole stake. It's magical, the way you are filled with love for kids you've never met before. Their good qualities just shine, even in their tough moments. God is real, guys, because it's not possible to love a group of teenagers like that without the influence of the Holy Ghost.

Our family had to create a cheer, and Marriner and I foisted a cheer on them - "We're grateful for this experience!" It was a good thing to cheer. We cheered it when we had blisters, when we accidentally slept on a cow pie, when we were walking in the dark with no end in sight, when we arrived at camp and had to start a fire before we could eat, and we were exhausted, when they made us put salt in our water because people were getting sick from losing electrolytes...and mostly, when we were SO. HOT. All these experiences were no fun, but we remembered why we were there, and were grateful to get to experience them. At least, I hope they're grateful for them now...I'm pretty sure our cheer had an air of propaganda at times while we were there.... :)

But I have to say, the real reason we love doing youth conference, the thing that keeps us volunteering every year (even though we don't volunteer in our church!) is getting to hang out with the most amazing adults in Southern Maryland. If we took all these same people and went to a party together, it would be fun, but not particularly meaningful. But when we go out and work together to teach the gospel to our youth, it is so amazing. The strength my testimony and commitment to follow Jesus gains from a few days with other people who love the Lord with all their hearts is immeasurable. I am so touched by their examples. And I'm full of love for them and the blessing of having such people lead my children.

On Sunday, our new Stake President sat down and talked to me for maybe half an hour. He'd been assigned by someone above him to meet with the wives of all the bishops/branch presidents and make sure they were doing ok, and that their husbands were treating them right :) I came out of the meeting just feeling great. I realized it was this same thing - the wonderful feeling of being with other people who are trying to serve the Lord. Knowing that Marriner and I are giving our all, but there are lots of other people out there giving their all, and we're all looking out for each other. 

I feel that way about our branch, too. People talk a lot about feeling a special spirit in our branch. Part of that, I'm sure, is the experience of worshiping in a different way. But honestly, part of that is being with a bunch of people who drive past several other churches every week to come to the church where they can give their best to the Lord. And people who all come together with their one Deaf family member, instead of just going to the ward that would be more convenient for the rest of them. They're all sacrificing, and it gives us a certain special portion of strength and unity. 

On a totally different note...it was Fast Sunday this last week, which is a week where we all fast for 2 meals, then in Sacrament meeting people have an opportunity to share testimonies with each other. I generally enjoy bearing my testimony, but I've struggled with it a bit lately, and I finally realized why this week. I debated with myself a long time about whether to bear my testimony, and what to say, and finally I decided to do it. When I sat down, I was frustrated that I hadn't really expressed what was in my heart very well. In English, I'm good with words and can put feelings into sentences fairly well. And it turns out, I have a little pride there. I like feeling like my words are influential. And when I come away feeling like my words didn't have much convincing power, I feel frustrated. So the next month, I try again. And it's still less than what is in my heart. And I get frustrated again. In our previous ward, there was a sister who was a native Spanish speaker who bore her testimony every month, even though it was never very eloquent. I wonder if she just wished every month that she could express herself better.